As most of you know, my husband and I just moved to a small town of about four thousand people, of which we knew nothing about before moving and had never even visited or known anyone that had visited.
It has been almost four months since we moved and we are just starting to meet and really get to know people now. That is four full months of me not really knowing or speaking with anyone other than my husband when he gets home from work. No friends or family to come over for dinners or chats at night, just the two of us.
Let me tell you, it was exactly what our marriage and our family needed in this season. God knows so much better than we do doesn’t He?
In all honesty though, our lives in the city were so busy, constantly this go go go attitude and way of life. Since moving, we have had the time to actually focus in on what we want our marriage to look like and what we want our family to look like. It has been the greatest blessing to us. My husband and I were able to address issues in our marriage that had we stayed in the city, probably wouldn’t have even chatted abut until they got much worse. I have been able to shape my days as a stay at home mom and with my husbands knowledge and guidance, start teaching our child and placing more structure to our day so that he is learning constantly and growing into the little boy God has planned for him to be.
One of the major changes we have been working on in our marriage (and i will write more about in an upcoming post) is living out our biblical roles. The bible clearly tells us as wives to be submissive to our husbands and clearly states that husbands should lead their wives. Let me tell you, once we started walking this out, I have seen such a huge difference in our marriage and just how we interact with each other.
So with that here are five ways to grow closer to Christ with your husband..
5 Ways to Grow Closer To Christ with Your Husband
One – Biblical Roles
But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God
1 Corinthians 11:3 NIV
For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior
Ephesians 5:23 NIV
Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives
1 Peter 3:1 NIV
My husband and I though pursuing Christ together, never really understood or even looked into what our biblical roles in our marriage were. We have been married for two and a half years now and have just recently started walking in our biblical roles and it has been huge for our marriage. It’s not easy, your flesh will want the opposite of what your biblical role is. I am not a submissive woman naturally but God is molding my heart into more of His. There is great joy and blessing in obeying God’s word when it comes to your role as a wife or husband in your marriage.
Two – Pray Together
Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.
Matthew 18:19-20 NIV
I will start by saying, if you are newly married, the thought of praying out loud with your spouse makes you nervous or the thought of praying does not come naturally to you, my husband and I have both been there! I will share with you a book that actually got our prayer life as a couple started and helped really ease us into the action of praying together daily. The book is called Always & Forever: Marriage In Light of Eternity by Francis and Lisa Chan . This book really helped boost our prayer life from absolute nothing to praying several times a day together and I highly recommend it if you struggle in this area. Praying together, you will not only grow immeasurably closer to your spouse through prayer but your relationship with Christ Himself will grow abundantly as well. It is such a blessing to be able to lay it all at His feet with your spouse along side of you.
Three – Read Scripture Together
It is such a blessing to our marriage to read the living word of God together, I am able to ask my husband questions if i don’t understand a verse, we discuss what we’ve read afterward and can let each other know if for whatever reason we received different interpretations of a verse and then search out the correct interpretation together afterwards. Something my husband and I will be starting next week is reading the bible in one year together, its a study through an online marriage course we are currently doing. Other examples are doing a devotional together, or even picking up a bible study you are both interested from your local Christian Book Store and working through that together. It doesn’t have to take a lot of time out of your day, even ten minutes would be beneficial to you both.
Four – Show Affection to Your Spouse
Be constantly physically affectionate towards your spouse throughout the day, touch each other’s hands when you pass by, make a habit of kissing each other throughout the day, even if it’s just a few short pecks! Hug your spouse and not just for a quick amount of time actually stop what you are doing and hold eachother, this is a great way to connect. God shows his loving affection to us throughout our days and we should be consistent in showing the same to our spouse.
Five – Attend a Marriage Course Together
Last but definitely not least! Attend a marriage course together! This one took us until about two months ago to actually follow through on, but the fruit of it has been amazing in our marriage!. See if your church has a weekly marriage bible study you can attend , look for marriage retreats, there are even some online Christian Marriage courses you can do, and if for some reason none of those work for you, look up Christian marriage on YouTube and watch either a sermon or my husband and I watch weekly videos by both Aaron and Jennifer Smith on their YouTube channel Marriage After God and also every Wednesday Dale and Veronica Partridge post a video on YouTube ” Ultimate Marriage” that coincides with the Online marriage course we are doing through them, both of these are great and encourage discussion between my husband and I. One last thing, many friends have encouraged us to take part in a marriage course, we never could because of either finances (a weekend marriage retreat normally starts around $300/2 nights) or the fact that any marriage bible studies took place in the evening and we had a baby who had to be asleep and at the time couldn’t afford a sitter. We totally felt called when we saw that Dale and Veronica Partridge were starting an ONLINE marriage course, something we could do after our son goes to sleep and though it does cost money, it’s not overtly expensive considering it’s a full year course, with an online Facebook group that you can post questions in, ask for prayer at any point. Sound doctrine and biblical marriage advice. I will post all of the links below so you can find everyone.
Marriage After God by Aaron and Jennifer Smith – YouTube
Ultimate Marriage – 12 Month Online Course by Dale and Veronica Partridge